Saturday, March 12, 2011

Head! MOVE!

I love hats but I cannot wear them. The movie, the King's Speech, with all those wonderful costumes,  made me long for the days when women could perch those adorable creations atop their heads. It wasn't so long ago that hats were a integral part of a woman's attire.

Nana and Grandpa Nicoll

My grandmother Nicoll (my mum's mum) used to travel into Toronto once a month to purchase a new chapeau. She was the wife of a minister, so it really was a necessary clothing item. Can you imagine devoting a day a month to picking out a hat? What a different time that was.

In the world I inhabit, hats seem silly and a little pretentious. Occasionally you'll see them at a wedding, and of course at the Kentucky Derby - but those are usually outrageous. I'm talking about those wee little things that get pinned on and into your hair. With interesting hat pins - another lost clothing item.

It would be difficult for me to find a hat that I could wear. My problem: very large forehead. I've been teased about it since, well since I can remember. Old pictures prove that my head has always been a issue. And, my poor mother, in an attempt to make me as cute as she could, tried to hide the monster head.
Really, it was almost half of my face.  I know from studying the golden ratio (phi), that my proportions just are not the right ratio for a face. And, that hat pictured here! Good grief. It looks more like a handkerchief. Oh, well.

The fact that I was teased about my enormous noggin, made me somewhat resilient. My dad used to tell me my head was big in order to fit all the brains crammed inside. It helped me. At least he wasn't heartless (and ultimately hilarious) as the dad in the Mike Meyer's movie "So, I married an Axe murderer". One of the funniest scenes in the movie. At least it is to someone with a planetoid head.

I wish that hats were still around so I could camouflage my flaw. For now, I have to rely on bangs. At least Bill doesn't mind. For him, size never mattered. 

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